17 June, 2006

Tarken, the cynic

cynic
n : someone who is critical of the motives of others

Cynic \Cyn"ic\, n. (Gr. Philos)
...
2. One who holds views resembling those of the Cynics; a
snarler; a misanthrope; particularly, a person who
believes that human conduct is directed, either
consciously or unconsciously, wholly by self-interest or
self-indulgence, and that appearances to the contrary are
superficial and untrustworthy.

He could obtain from one morose cynic, whose opinion
it was impossible to despise, scarcely any not
acidulated with scorn. --Macaulay.

This, unfortunately, describes all too well what I have come to be. It is how I have come to view the world. I keep trying to change for the better, and through these changes I keep finding that I can rely less and less on other people. I am finding one ultimate truth: "Take care of yourself, cause ain't nobody else going to."

I hate being like this. I have very little, if any, faith left in humanity. I wish it wasn't that way. Maybe some day, but not today.

There was nothing specific leading me to post this. It's just something that needs to be said. Some people have noticed that I seem more bitter, or that I'm less trusting. They're right.

One of the best pieces of advice I was ever given was this: "I am the Mac truck. Get out of the way, or get run over."

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i agree that i'm like this to some degree as well.

it's because i've been let down too many times, and that i feel i'm there for people more than they are for me.

sigh.

frekur said...

That sounds like me. Did I post that comment above anonymously?

Either way, lighten up. :)