17 May, 2006

Buzzword Bingo

Alright, so yes... I've been in the market for a new job. Looking, searching, hunting. I need a change. I need a challenge. I need .... fair compensation.

But I've come to realize that I really dislike most employers. Maybe it's just their HR departments. Maybe it's the heads of IT who just know "What's Hot" in the industry... who knows. But they all love their buzzwords. Me? I hate 'em. I keep seeing more of them all the time. And, sadly enough, I keep on adding them to my resume.

Some of these buzzwords I see are based around things I've been doing for a long time, just never really bothered naming it. One of the (relatively) new crazes is LAMP and WAMP development. Double eww tee eff is that? Turns out, it's exactly what I've done for ..... uhh... 6 years? Well, sorta. LAMP generally stands for "Linux, Apache, MySQL, PHP".. substitute in Windows and you've got WAMP. Hey, come to think of it, you could also have WIMP (Windows, IIS, MySQL, PHP).. heh, appropriate. Anyhow, back on topic, LAMP is something I'm very familiar with... but it's never been on my resume, and still will never be. That's way too buzzword for me. Anyways, I graduated from MySQL years ago.. been using PostgreSQL for several years. LAPP doesn't have quite the same ring to it though.

So I'm finding all these job postings that require me to know all of these buzzwords... and some of them are just ridiculously stupid. Okay so example, I see a job requiring experience with , XML, and XPath. Okay well I've got XML experience ... great! But hell, I've never used XPath ... have I? So I grab an XML reference from the bookshelf, read for 15 minutes ... okay, I now know XPath! How silly is that? If it's something I can pick up in a matter of 15 minutes, why BOTHER having it on my resume? Because I've seen it on so many different job requirement lists is why. I don't get it. I really don't.

I just wish the era of the buzzword would DIE.

Oh and don't forget "Web 2.0". Grr. Hiss. Spit.

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